As homeschooling parents, we have all faced similar situations. In this case, when someone discovers that you homeschool and then takes it upon themselves to quiz your children. My initial internal desire is to quiz the very person standing before us, because who does that? Does this person walk up to random children on any given day and quiz their intelligence? Probably not. Needless to say, I do not give in to my first desire. I hold back and then……..
I hold my breath.
After all, I am with my children all day every day. I’ve heard the “gems” (snort..) that have come out of their mouths. What will they say today? There have been days when they had an answer to every ridiculous question thrown at them. (Yay!) There have been days when they could answer high school level questions that I honestly don’t remember teaching them. (Score!) But then, there are days when they randomly spout out words that make me want to shrink into a little hole and hide. Granted, they are children, and children lack filters much of the time. Also, not all of these “gems” were said in the presence of strangers or quiz masters. None the less, they were said. Here are a few :
- “Mama, when I grow up, I want to grow the world’s longest armpit hair!”
- “Hey mama? Was George Washington president when you were little?”
- (speaking to an adult) “Once, when my mom was asleep on the couch, we wrote on the walls with a sharpie.”
- (speaking to his brother) “I have a lot of cents. Not common sense, but cents like change.”
- (speaking to his brother) “Your butt is flawless!!”
- “Mama! I don’t think I’m allergic to gluten anymore! I snuck some regular food and didn’t get sick!!” (He DID get sick. In the form of night terrors)
- “Santa Claus is in the North Pole. Yeah, he’s naked…..”
- “A really REALLY long time ago, back in the 80’s…………”
- “Mama, do chocolate eggs come from chocolate chickens??”
- (after my oldest grabbed my hand while walking through a parking lot) “Yeah, its always good to help the elderly cross the street.”
However, not all cringe worthy moments are verbal. There are many incidents of action. Like when you take your family out to a nice sit down restaurant for dinner and your 5 year old mistakes the emergency exit as the regular door. The alarm blares, managers frantically fumble for the correct key, other patrons give you dirty looks……..
Take heart, friend. We’ve all been there. Motherhood, and homeschooling are not for the faint of heart. Embrace these days. Learn to laugh, and relax. You’re doing just fine!